STRESSED OUT
We all have a favourite expression when it comes to being stressed out. Mine goes something like I am so stressed out I can’t think straight.
However when you think about it, it is how we work or even relax for that matter, that triggers stress. Ever been stressed even when you’re well relaxed and bored?
This tells me also that I need to reprogram the mind change my routines, change my thinking.
Since I am largely self-employed these days I tend to have periods of intense activity and then periods of quiet. I might have three gardens to deal with this week, two days of teaching and then someone rings up and asks me to do an extra day.
On top of that I have a weekend workshop and a family dinner that I just cannot miss. It feels like a juggling act.
Relax
Well I get through it all and then the next week I have two days off. No work. No phone calls, no family commitments, nothing. So I start the first day and the tension starts to build as I wonder what I should be doing but have forgotten. Or I feel guilty since my wife is at work and I am relaxing at home. I would feel much better if I just went out and worked. But my old career was causing me too much stress. The doctor told me to quit or I would be dead before I turned 50.
The Unavoidable Stress
Since stress is unavoidable in life, it is important to find ways to decrease and prevent stressful incidents and decrease negative reactions to stress. I have found that a very important skill or plan to apply to your life is routine. Sounds boring I know but look it more closely.
Routine does not have to mean rigidly controlling your life - it does however mean a little more planning to life than just drifting from one day to the next.
Put some structure into your day - you probably have it already for mundane tasks like brushing your teeth or eating breakfast. Look more closely at your days and manage the time more carefully.
Time Management
Time management skills can help you manage your time more so that there is more for your family and friends. You will also find an increase in performance and productivity. Knowing when certain things will be achieved and finished can lower your stress levels markedly.
So to improve your time management:
Keep a record of how you spend your time for a week or two. This includes work, family, leisure and me time. Examine your record and prioritise your time by rating each task you have identified - put more time on the ones that are more meaningful or important to you.
Manage your time by not over-committing to non-essential projects. Even look at delegation of minor tasks if it is possible. (Maybe the neighbours kid can tidy your yard for a few bucks a week?)
Take big tasks and break them into smaller bite sized chunks. This will stop procrastination because the job does not seem so overwhelming.
Lifestyle
Remember that your bodily response to stress is largely a chemical, hormonal one. Your body has devised mechanisms for survival and you fall into old patterns of coping very easily. It is these old mechanisms that are contributing to your failure to cope with the stress.
To beat this you need to be pre-emptive:
relax from stress
- Eat good quality food and avoid high sugar and caffeine soothers.
- Get regular daily exercise - you don’t have to jog 20 kilometres, just do something that gets a little bit of a sweat up.
- Get the right amount of sleep for you. Your really should have an idea of what your good sleep time is and really work on getting that every night. (If not sure then experiment - 1/2 an hour more here 1/2 an hour less. Just try it.)
- Limit alcohol consumption - don’t drown your stress.
- Have balance in your life. Work, family, obligations, leisure etc
- Have a real big, well thought out purpose for your month, year -life.
- Invest in self improvement on a regular basis.
Change Your Thinking
Did you know that the body’s response to a stressful event is identical to the processes triggered by a real full on physical threat - like a dog chasing you, or a near miss in the car.
Now if a stressful event triggers negative thoughts you may feel the following, fear, insecurity, anxiety, depression, rage, guilt, and a sense of being overwhelmed. So that over committed work schedule can bring on stress, negative thinking and all those powerful debilitating emotions as much as a real physical threat. You need to spend time reprogramming the mind.
Stop and Witness
My Yoga instructors taught me very early on in my classes to stop and listen to my mind.
Be a witness to what is going on in there. Don’t judge it, just observe.
At first this was difficult but in time I got better at it and of course they taught me strategies to improve my skill at it.
Success in stress management will come from a commitment to self improvement. It is a long game that starts with baby steps. I encourage you to take the little steps and get back control of your mind, lower your stress and improve your life.
Dean’s book, Reprogramming The Mind For Success, covers many of the ideas I have touched on here today and I encourage you to take the next step and buy his book. You will find many great tools that are practical and doable and will easily fit into tour daily routines and get you out from under the stress in your life.
I wish all the best in managing your stress,
John
Richard colum
